The Next Evolutionary Step
I was lurking in the Woolworths car park, cruising slowly and waiting to nab a car space. I had a mission to buy milk and honey, they were at the top of my shopping list. I was musing on the Land of Milk and Honey and wondering what it was like there. Suddenly bang, a truck/ute scooted out of a car park and hit my car. My first reaction was unprintable but predictable. I realised immediately that it was not actually my fault and that I’d have to collect the other driver’s insurance and licence details, suddenly a furious face appeared at my window, gosh he was quick, and started yelling at me, his reaction was also unprintable.

I was blocking his ute’s exit so he was not going anywhere till I said so. Still he was cursing me out and I said, “When you stop yelling at me we can swap our details.” I was ready to take a four by two plank to this guy but I breathed in and followed a decision I made many years ago, if someone is yelling at me I turn my back, at least mentally (those of you who have seen the Mighty Boosh will recognise the tactic used by Naboo the Enigma). Anyway Mr Ute in his fitted shirt was ready for a stroke so I stayed in my car till his colour moved through the spectrum from puce to pink. Suffice to say he gave me his details and I eventually got my car fixed at his insurance company’s expense.

At the moment I’m looking at the effects of the neurotransmitter dopamine and its influence on addiction, aggression, reward and impulse behaviour. It’s implicated that societies, populated by people with high dopamine levels are materialistic, aggressive, focused and drive big 4 wheel drives. I’m in a chemical hell hole and they’re breeding.

The dopaminergic mind hypothesis seeks to explain the differences between modern humans and their hominid relatives by focusing on changes in the neurotransmitter dopamine. It theorizes that increased levels of dopamine were part of a general physiological adaptation due to an increased consumption of meat around two million years ago in Homo habilis, and later enhanced by changes in diet and other environmental and social factors beginning approximately 80,000 years ago.

Under this theory, the “high-dopamine” personality is characterized by high intelligence, a sense of personal destiny, a religious/cosmic preoccupation, an obsession with achieving goals and conquests, an emotional detachment that in many cases leads to ruthlessness, and a risk-taking mentality. High levels of dopamine are proposed to underlie increased psychological disorders in industrialized societies. According to this hypothesis, a “dopaminergic society” is extremely goal-oriented, fast-paced and even manic. Given that dopamine is known to increase activity levels, speed up our internal clocks and create a preference for novel over unchanging environments, it’s hardly surprising that stress related illnesses are on the increase.

In the same way that high-dopamine individuals lack empathy and exhibit a more masculine behavioural style, dopaminergic societies are “typified by more conquest, competition, and more aggression than nurturance and communality. Although behavioural evidence and some indirect anatomical evidence (e.g., enlargement of the dopamine-rich striatum in humans) a dopaminergic expansion in humans, there is still no direct evidence that dopamine levels are markedly higher in humans relative to other apes. However, recent discoveries about the sea-side settlements of early man may provide evidence of dietary changes consistent with this hypothesis.

All I can say in response to this information is that I am looking at the competitive often unconsciously unpleasant behaviour of people under stress. I am attempting to understand this society. Dopamine while increasing general drive also is implicated In behavioural disorders like ADHD and lack of inhibitory control or impulse control. Addiction is rife in our society, maybe this is the price we pay for our focus on material success. Individuas are the sacrificed to the God Mammon, the high priests are the bottom line men and women who put profits and personal success above community and the communication of our true selves.

It is easier to control my behaviour towards others if I have some understanding of their motives or at least some ability to abstract and attempt to understand from a perspective removed from the behaviour. Then at least I have a chance to behave in a vaguely civilised manner. Ute man was a test, I wanted to slap him but how stupid would that have been. Even as his puce face hovered near my car’s window I realised that his anger had nothing to do with me and he had no control. I had no control over what I thought, note the four by two fantasy, but was able to maintain a semblance of humour and distance. I thought he was behaving idiotically there by for the grace of the gods go I.

The more information we have as to why we behave in certain ways, the more insight and possibilities of self control we will have. Change your perspective and you will start to change the world.

These changes in our very chemistry are from one perspective evolutionary, the survival of the fittest idiom applies. I believe the next evolutionary step has to take us into a more cooperative frame of reference. It’ll mean developing social and emotional intelligence, instead of win or lose. It will mean compassion will be a higher value than competition. It will mean facing our greatest enemy our own fear and living on this planet rather than living off this resource rich rock. Maybe love and compassion are the next evolutionary steps

Compassion, the key to evolution
http://blog.ted.com/2011/09/02/compassion-and-the-true-meaning-of-empathy-joan-halifax-on-ted-com/.

This is the final instalment in explorations of the 6 emotions embedded in your body, Anger, Fear, Joy, Sadness, Disgust and lastly Surprise.
Surprise
The expression of surprise is the briefest of all the emotions. It occurs in response to an unforeseen event. Surprise will usually be followed immediately by another emotion such as anger if the surprise was unwanted, joy if the surprise is a welcomed one or fear if there is danger accompanying the unanticipated event. Surprise can also turn into shock, a more enduring emotion.

Reality Construction
Surprise is intimately connected to the idea of acting in accordance with a set of rules. When the rules of reality generating events of daily life separate from the rules of thumb expectations, surprise is the outcome. Surprise represents the difference between expectations and reality, the gap between our assumptions and expectations about worldly events and the way that those events actually turnout. In essence, surprises are the end result of predictions that fail.

Body Language
Surprise is expressed in the face by the following features:

• Eyebrows that are raised so they become curved and high.
• Horizontal wrinkles across the forehead.
• Open eyelids: the upper lid is raised and the lower lid is drawn down, often exposing the white sclera  above and below the iris.
• Dropped jaw so that the lips and teeth are parted, with no tension around the mouth.
  

Spontaneous, involuntary surprise is often expressed for only a fraction of a second. It may be followed immediately by the emotion of fear, joy or confusion. The intensity of the surprise is associated with how much the jaw drops, but the mouth may not open at all in some cases. The raising of the eyebrows, at least momentarily, is the most distinctive and predictable sign of surprise.

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How Surprising

The word surprising is often used to describe things that are not surprising merely bemusing or bewildering. A friend might say or do something hurtful and you describe it later by saying, ”I was surprised by the attack.” When in actual fact you were hurt, upset or offended.

A surprise comes out of the blue, a slap (verbal or physical) is surprising, a stolen kiss may also be astonishing (It’s a good simile for surprising). Surprise  leaves you feeling breathless and even a little dazed.  A surprise is a bolt from the blue.  An old friend or enemy suddenly appearing in front of you in a foreign city is a surprise. So there’s both good and bad surprises.

It was a late Autumn day, I was on my way to meet a friend to catch up.  There was  a focaccia shop in the city (this was the 90’s when frock and focaccia shops proliferated).  It had a sunny aspect and great herb teas made with fresh herbs not tea bags. My friend was excited about something and as his best friend I wanted to hear all about it.

Bob had been in London and had got back the day before.  He still looked rumpled and kinda not quite real, I put it down to jet lag, little did I know that within minutes I would be the one with the appearance of major dislocation.  I got to the shop on time and set about ogling the cute waiter and scanning the menu. Intent on my carnal pursuits I didn’t see Bob enter.  He sat down beside me, kissing me as he swept his fabulous new camel hair coat aside.

He’d gone to London to a family wedding and stayed to catch up with friends and take a short break in Southern France.  Bob started to show me some holiday snaps and there in the southern Pyrenees with her arms through Bobs was my closest friend from university and then to compound it she walked into the shop.

Yep they’d met on hols.  My jaw dropped so far it musta dislocated.  That was a surprise, a good surprise.  Bob and Jacky now live in Melbourne and are happily raising 2 children, 4 chickens and lots of basil.

Now a bad surprise, well it was kind bad/funny.  I was at the local pub and listening to a good covers bank, normally that would be an oxymoron to me but I was charmed by the music.  The music paused and a guy in the audience started to chat to me.  I responded politely enough I think.  Anyway when the music restarted a few minutes later I turned away from him.  He tapped me on he shoulder, I was kinda annoyed to be interrupted, but I turned and he said, ”People like you castrate men.”

I was surprised, heard my heart go pound, pound. I shut my dropped jaw with a snap. I thought, “That’s a hell of a pick up line.” I turned my head and looked at him for another few pounds and said, ”Only if they ask nicely.”

Surprise, surprise he scuttled off.  I was surprised because it was so out of context and really little to do with me but directed at me. That was the surprise, it was like the end of a really bad joke.

Fear

The expression of fear is a warning signal and is triggered in situations where there is a threat or danger (real or imagined). Fear is also part of the fight-or-flight response system that humans have developed as a survival mechanism. When you feel fear, your bodies respond by shutting down unnecessary systems and rushing blood to the larger muscles in your legs in preparation for defense or flight.

Fear should be distinguished from the related emotional state of anxiety,  which typically occurs without any external threat. Additionally, fear is related to the specific behaviors of escape and avoidance, whereas anxiety is the result of threats which are perceived to be uncontrollable or unavoidable.   Worth noting is that fear almost always relates to future events, such as worsening of a situation, or continuation of a situation that is unacceptable. Fear could also be an instant reaction to something presently happening.

Fear is a chain reaction in the brain that starts with a stressful stimulus and ends with the release of chemicals that cause a racing heart, fast breathing and energized muscles, among other things, also known as the fight-or-flight response. The stimulus could be a spider, a knife at your throat, an auditorium full of people waiting for you to speak or the sudden thud of your front door against the door frame.

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
— Frank Herbert, Dune – Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear

“What we fear comes to pass more speedily than what we hope.”
—- Publilius Syrus – Moral Sayings (1st C B.C.)

“A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice.”
—- Edgar Watson Howe – Country Town Sayings (1911)

Courage is not the lack of fear but the ability to face it.”
—- Lt. John B. Putnam Jr. (1921-1944)

Physical Reactions:
Fear causes a variety of reactions depending on the intensity, timing, and coping options available. The reactions include:

• Freezing in place and feeling terror if you can’t do anything to avoid the  immediate danger.
• Running or escaping from the immediate danger,
• Sharply focusing your attention and mobilizing you to act to reduce or eliminate the danger when you can take effective action to cope with the  threat.
• Panic, including shortness of breath, racing heartbeat, and the inability  to focus on anything but worrying about the feared future event,
• Fighting to destroy the object of our fear.
• Fear also often causes cold hands, deeper and more rapid breathing, increased heart rate, increased blood pressure, sweating, dry mouth, and trembling or tightening of the muscles, especially in the arms and legs.
  

You estimate the risks and vulnerability of the threat almost instantly and then fight, freeze, focus, or flee based on this assessment.

The evolutionary mystery of why your face contorts when you are scared has been solved by a team of Canadian neuro-scientists.

“When our facial expression shifts to one of eye-bulging, nostril-flaring fear, our ability to sense attackers or other imminent danger improves dramatically, researchers found.

The findings lend support to an idea first laid out by Charles Darwin in one of his less well-known tomes, The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals, published in 1872. Darwin noted that facial expressions of emotion were often remarkably similar across human cultures, and even the animal kingdom, implying they may have a common evolutionary benefit.

“Most people think expressions are social signals, that they are intended to communicate what someone’s feeling. We’re saying they probably evolved as a sensory function first, even if they do help convey our feelings to others,” said Adam Anderson, a cognitive neuro-scientist who led the study at the University of Toronto.

Writing in the journal Nature Neuroscience, Anderson and his colleague Joshua Susskind reveal how the classic expression of fear increases our range of vision, speeds up eye movement and improves air flow through the nose. All of these reactions boost our ability to see or smell threats and prepare ourselves for the “fight or flight” response, where we either battle it out with our attacker or take to our heels.

In the study, Susskind developed computer models for the facial expressions of fear and disgust. He then trained volunteers to pull each face. A fearful expression required participants to widen their eyes, raise their eyebrows and flare their nostrils, while a disgusted face was the opposite: a lowered brow, closed eyes and scrunched-up nose.

Measurements from video footage revealed those pulling fearful faces were not only better at spotting objects either side of them, but scanned their eyes faster, suggesting they could see danger coming more quickly.

In another round of tests, volunteers pulling disgusted faces were found to have a reduced field of vision and slower air flow through the nose.

“Fear expressions open up the face and expose the sensory surfaces, whereas disgust does the opposite, it’s a protective wincing. Fear is about vigilance and disgust is rejection,” said Anderson.

The team confirmed their findings by asking volunteers to pull different expressions while inside a magnetic resonance imaging scanner. The images reveal that fear expressions open up the nasal tubes, allowing air to be breathed in twice as fast as someone pulling a disgusted expression.

“What we’re doing is psychological archaeology. We’re unearthing the residues of the functions of these expressions. Facial expressions might be more important as social signals, but that doesn’t explain where they came from. This work explains why these expressions are common across cultures,” said Anderson.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2008/jun/15/fear.science

Joy is the feeling of grinning inside

Joy is personal, an exultant reaction to an event or momentary perceived fulfilment of a personal desire. Weddings, births, graduations, sex, drugs evoke joy in individuals. It is spontaneous, unexpected and pleasurable.

More clinically, joy is the passion or emotion excited by the acquisition or expectation of good; pleasurable feelings or emotions caused by success, good fortune, and the like, or by a rational prospect of possessing what we love or desire; gladness; exhilaration of spirits; delight.

The signs or exhibition of joy; smiling widely, gayety, mirth, merriment, festivity.

Joy is an emotion of sincere happiness. The key visual component of this emotional state is the smile. Still, “Why do we smile?” Animals don’t smile. Baring the teeth is actually an aggressive facial signal. This is a great psychological question and we’ve not been able to find a convincing (non-BS) answer. So … maybe this hypothesis applies. “Humans descended from pre-cretaceous non-predatory mammals in which dental excellence and root chewing ability was more important and than fangs. Good teeth = good mate?”

The expression of joy communicates a state of happiness, pleasure, enjoyment and ecstasy. A true expression of happiness involves both the upper part and lower part of your face. Whereas most of us relate happiness with a pull up and back of the lip corners, a critical element to the emotion is also the contraction of the orbicularis oculi, the muscle surrounding the eyes. This true smile, also known as Duchenne smile is anatomically distinct and indicates a genuine feeling of happiness.

Next time you greet someone, try to focus on your face and the type of smile you give the person. Are you feeling genuine happiness? Is your whole face smiling or just your lips? Once you have mastered identifying your smile start watching how others smile at you!

It seems you are more likely to experience joy if your base line of happiness is reasonably high. Happiness is a shared emotion and is often dependant on communal and community events, work interactions and feelings of success, fulfilment and well being. Joy is a personal feeling event.

Evidence suggests that, with the exception of the years 40 – 50, most people generally get happier as they get older. Researchers specify that people in both their 20’s and 70’s tend to be happier than during midlife, although the measures of happiness change at different rates (e.g. feelings of stress and anger tend to decline after age 20, worrying drops after age 50, enjoyment had been very slowly declining but finally starts to rise after 50, etc)

This could be for any number of things. Psychological factors could include a greater awareness of one’s self and preferences; an ability to control desires and hold more realistic expectations; getting closer to death may motivate people to pursue more goals; improved social skills, like forgiveness, may take years to develop; or happier people may live longer and are slightly overrepresented in the elderly population. Chemical changes that come with age may also be playing a role.

An emotionally stable personality correlates well with happiness. Not only does emotional stability make one less prone to negative emotions, it also predicts higher social intelligence – which helps to manage relationships with others (an important part of being happy).

Cultivating an extroverted temperament may correlate with happiness for the same reason: it builds relationships and support groups. Some people may be lucky, then, that many personality theories leave room for the idea that individuals have some control over their long term behaviours and cognitions. Genetic studies indicate that it is genes for personality (specifically extraversion, neuroticism and a general factor linking all 6 traits that account for the heritability of subjective well-being.

“Joy is the feeling of grinning inside.”

Joy in looking and comprehending is nature’s most beautiful gift. Albert Einstein

It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge. Albert Einstein

We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. Buddha

We are formed and moulded by our thoughts. Those whose minds are shaped by selfless thoughts give joy when they speak or act. Joy follows them like a shadow that never leaves them. Buddha

Service which is rendered without joy helps neither the servant nor the served. But all other pleasures and possessions pale into nothingness before service which is rendered in a spirit of joy. Mohandas Gandhi

Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. Mother Teresa

Work is love made visible. And if you cannot work with love but only with distaste, it is better that you should leave your work and sit at the gate of the temple and take alms of those who work with joy. Khalil Gibran

Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humour itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven. Mark Twain

Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with. Mark Twain

The secret source of humour is not joy but sorrow; there is no humour in Heaven. Mark Twain

Read more: http://www.brainyquote.com/words

So to joy, thinking, thinking back to feeling it. I was in a troubled state of mind, divorce bound and attempting an unconditional love for the people involved, myself the circumstances and especially my feelings. I got tired of the hours of contemplation, of balancing my perception, of remembering and neutralizing my feelings and their genesis.

I was alone and unable to concentrate. I made some tea, and idly picked up a book of Ralph Waldo’s Emerson’s essays. I had read them, with great pleasure, in the past and now the book fell open at the essay ‘Circles’ and I read, “There is no virtue which is final; all are initial. The virtues of society are vices of the saint. The terror of reform is the discovery that we must cast away our virtues, or what we have always esteemed such, into the same pit that has consumed our grosser vices.” I don’t really know why but suddenly I was catapulted into a state of intense joy, white light and I felt my face break into a big smile. I still to this day don’t totally understand what made me so joyful, but I still hark back to it and am usually happier for doing so.
(Here is a link to the same essay if you wish to read it, it’s brilliant: http://emerson.classicauthors.net/CirclesAnEssay/)

Still, I have had more comprehensible states of joy. My small son running towards me with his arms out and a huge grin on his face made me break out into joy, listening to music will sometimes make me feel joyous, Sigur Ros with its epic soaring rhythms can bring me to my knees and make me feel transported with joy. Joy meets some unexpected need in us and its birth is sudden and its life fleeting.

 

Anger makes you right for a moment

I’m on a roll here.  First sadness, then disgust now anger, the third emotion in this series of physically embedded emotions we carry across all cultures, universal experiences.  I regard them as the six primary lessons.

When you get to the lists of different types of anger don’t immediately think, ”Ah yes, they got angry that way.” Or ,”Yup she’s like that”.  Be honest and think, “When have I done that?” And then don’t beat yourself around the head for being angry just acknowledge that even  the worst anger is to protect yourself or what you regard as yours from harm. It’s very natural and teaches us what is important to us. We can push it  to extremes that’s when problems arise and that is what we as  people need to address.  So Anger 101.
Anger
Anger is an emotion related to your interpretation of events, you see yourself as been offended, wronged or denied and to undo that you retaliate. Anger is a normal emotion that involves a strong, uncomfortable and emotional response to a perceived provocation. Anger has many physical signs, such as, increased heart rate, blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and nor-adrenaline.

Some view anger as part of the fight or flight brain response to a perceived threat of harm. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviourally, cognitively and physiologically when a person makes the conscious choice to take action to immediately and stop the threatening behaviour of another outside force. Anger can have many physical, emotional and mental consequences.

The external expression of anger can be found in your facial expressions, body language, physiological responses, and at times in public acts of aggression.  Humans and animals for example make loud sounds, attempt to look physically larger, bare their teeth and stare.  The behaviours associated with anger are designed to warn aggressors to stop their threatening behaviour. Rarely does a physical altercation occur without the prior expression of anger by at least one of the participants. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of “what has happened to them,” psychologists point out that an angry person can be very well be mistaken because anger causes a massive loss in self-monitoring capacity and objectivity.
Facial Expressions of Anger

• Eyebrows lowered and pulled together to form wrinkles on the skin of the forehead, frowning
• the upper eyelids are raised (glaring)
• tensed and straightened lower eyelids
• tension and thinning in lips and mouth
• pressed lips with a slight pushing up of the chin point or open mouth vocalising
• the chin point is pushed up.
  

What is anger?
Anger is an emotion that can range from mild annoyance to intense rage. It is a feeling that is accompanied by biological changes in your body. When you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure rise and stress hormones are released. This can cause you to shake, become hot and sweaty and feel out of control.

When people have angry feelings, they often behave in angry ways too. Angry behaviours include yelling, throwing things, criticising, ignoring, storming out and sometimes withdrawing and doing nothing.

Anger can often lead to violence if not properly controlled and some people use anger as an excuse for being abusive towards others. Violence and abusive behaviour gives someone power and control over another person usually through creating fear.

Passive anger
Passive anger can be expressed in the following ways:

• Dispassion, or indifference such as giving the cold shoulder or phony smiles, looking unconcerned, sitting on the fence  while others sort things out, dampening feelings with substance abuse, overeating, oversleeping, not responding to another’s anger, frigidity, indulging in sexual practices that depress spontaneity and make objects of participants, giving inordinate amounts of time to machines, objects or intellectual pursuits, talking of frustrations but showing no feeling.
• Evasiveness, such as turning your back in a crisis, avoiding conflict, not arguing back, becoming phobic.
• Ineffectualness, such as setting yourself and others up for failure, choosing unreliable people to depend on, being accident prone, underachieving, sexual impotence, expressing frustration at insignificant things but ignoring serious ones.
• Obsessive behaviour , such as needing to be inordinately clean and tidy, making a habit of constantly checking things, over-dieting or overeating, demanding that all jobs be done perfectly.
• Psychological manipulation, such as provoking people to aggression and then patronizing them, provoking aggression but staying on the sidelines, emotional blackmail, false tearfulness, feigning illness, sabotaging relationships, using sexual provocation, using a third party to convey negative feelings, withholding money or resources.
• Secretive behaviour, such as stockpiling resentments that are expressed behind people’s backs, giving the silent treatment or under the breath mutterings, avoiding eye contact, putting people down, gossiping , anonymous complaints, poison pen letters, stealing and conning.
• Self-blame, such as apologizing too often, being overly critical, inviting criticism.
• Self-sacrifice, such as being overly helpful, making do with second best, quietly making long-suffering signs but refusing help, or lapping up gratefulness.
  

Aggressive anger
The symptoms of aggressive anger are:

• Bullying , such as threatening people directly, persecuting, pushing or shoving, using power to oppress, shouting, driving someone off the road, playing on people’s weaknesses.
• Destructiveness, such as destroying objects, harming animals, destroying a relationship, reckless driving, substance abuse  .
• Grandiosity, such as showing off, expressing mistrust, not delegating, being a sore loser, wanting centre stage all the time, not listening, talking over people’s heads, expecting kiss and make-up sessions to solve problems.
• Hurtfulness, such as physical violence, verbal abuse, biased or vulgar jokes, breaking a confidence, using foul language, ignoring people’s feelings, willfully discriminating, blaming, punishing people for unwarranted deeds, labelling others.
• Manic behaviour, such as speaking too fast, walking too fast, working too much and expecting others to fit in, driving too fast, reckless spending.
• Selfishness, such as ignoring others’ needs, not responding to requests for help, queue jumping.
• Threats, such as frightening people by saying how you could harm them, their property or their prospects, finger pointing, fist shaking, wearing clothes or symbols associated with violent behaviour, tailgating, excessively blowing a car horn, slamming doors.
• Unjust blaming, such as accusing other people for your own mistakes, blaming people for your own feelings, making general accusations.
• Unpredictability, such as explosive rages over minor frustrations, attacking indiscriminately, dispensing unjust punishment, inflicting harm on others for the sake of it, using alcohol and drugs, illogical arguments.
• Vengeance, such as being over-punitive, refusing to forgive and forget, bringing up hurtful memories from the past.

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I’m sure you all have personal stories about people who got angry with you, from parents to partners.  Experiences where you watched a person’s face distort with rage and were frightened or similarly enraged.  Think back to when you in turn were angry, for whatever reason. There you stood for one moment in time, self-righteous beyond anyone’s right to  contradict you.  Did you for that nano second feel powerful? When you are challenged you can feel put down then along comes compensating anger and you feel powerful again. Reaction, reaction and a mini war is evoked.

Most of us are particularly fond of blame.  This is a wonderful way of deflecting responsibility. Young children at times have a knee jerk reaction to accusations, “No wasn’t me.” “It was him.”  Fear at home, work, the beginning of our personalities distortion, fear of dire (real or imagined) consequences.  Fear begets anger.

Remember I am discussing the 6 biologically encoded emotions number 2.. Disgust..Enjoy

Disgust, the Mother Load
Horrid, dirty, smelly, putrid tastes or smells.
Moral outrage born of conditioning and misinformation.
Prejudice born from misplaced loyalties and judgements that get erroneously entangled with stomach heaving self aggrandizations.
Moral disgust: Self righteousness presupposing that you are more clean, morally upright, singled out by the gods for glorification and usually means the revolting masses disgust you.
Disgusting: Others who do not subscribe to your code of conduct and a rigid moral consciousness that engenders your disgust born of ignorance.

Disgust is one of the basic emotions of Paul Ekman’s six universal facial expressions of emotion. Unlike the emotions of fear, anger, and sadness, disgust is associated with a decrease in heart rate. It’s is probably designed biologically to draw you away from what you sense is harmful, but it got enmeshed with other perceptions and became visceral moral outrage.

A structure within your brain the insular cortex, mediates feelings of disgust and addictive compulsions. In motor control it contributes to hand and eye motor movement,  swallowing, gastric motility and speech articulation. It has been identified as a “command centre” that ensures your heart rate and blood pressure are regulated.  Functional imaging experiments have revealed that the insular cortex has an important role in your pain experience and the experience of a number of basic emotions including anger, fear, disgust happiness and sadness.

Disgust is an emotion that is typically associated with things that you regard as unclean, revolting, inedible, infectious, gory or otherwise offensive. Disgust is experienced primarily in relation to your sense of taste (either perceived or imagined) and secondarily to anything which causes a similar feeling by association with your sense of smell, touch, or vision. Musically sensitive people may even be disgusted by a cacophony of inharmonious sounds ( I relate strongly to that).

Disgust may be further subdivided into physical disgust, associated with physical or metaphorical uncleanliness and, moral disgust, a similar feeling, related to your judgements on behaviour and action. For example; “I am disgusted by the spiteful things that you are saying.” Moral disgust should be understood as culturally determined; physical disgust as more universally grounded, “I am disgusted by the filth in the house.”

Representations of disgust in literature, film and fine art are common. Since there are characteristic facial expressions (the clenched nostrils, the pursed lips), as Ekman and others have shown, they may be represented with more or less skill in any set of circumstances imaginable.

Since people know what disgust is, as a primary or visceral, emotion (with characteristic gestures and expressions), they may imitate it to express emotions like distain and contempt. Contempt and haughtiness are, for example, acted out on the basis of the visceral emotion, disgust, but they are not identical with disgust. They are “compound affects” that require intellectual preparation, subjective judgements and theatrical techniques. There are many such “intellectual” compound affects, such as nostalgia and outrage, but disgust is a fundamental and unmistakable example. Moral disgust, then, is different from visceral disgust, more conscious and more layered in performance.

Disgust is the mark of the bigot. Often majority dominant consciousness, employs disgust to “place” by diminishment and denigration a despised minority. Removing “disgust” from public discourse and educate people in tolerance and Broad mindedness would constitute important steps in achieving a humane and compassionate society.

Shame is linked to disgust primarily as a consequence rooted in self-consciousness. Disgust and shame dance intricately with each other.

Inner dialogues:
Oh my god that smell, reminds me of rotten meat, it’s coming from there, (points to a garbage bin). That’s disgusting, I feel nauseous.

Bar staff cleaning up, “I can’t understand why they had to put their food and cigarettes in the half drunk cocktails.  They’d not be doing that at home. Disgusting.”

I didn’t expect him to be so hairy, I can’t touch his skin, it’s disgusting.

He’s been with her again. He’s driven her in my car. How could he? God, I can’t breathe.  The bastard, and I’ve got to get in the car.  I can’t open the door, the thought of her in the car disgusts me. I’ve got to clean it, fumigate it.  I can’t touch the seat where she sat, the disgusting whore.  Oh my god I’m going to be sick.

You and Sarah! Sex between two women. It’s not right. How could you do something so disgusting? Depraved and vile that’s what it is. That’s against the will of God.  You are not my child.  Disgusting.

The dance of inner shame begets disgust and creates many delusions in this illusionary world.
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Yuk
A quiet night, that’s right, a quiet night, that’s what I wanted.  The gym will be quiet, I’ll go and work out, listen to laid back music on 2SER.  My expectations were raised.

The night was cold and I went with expectations of feeling calm. I arrived at the gym and a big pug faced man with a white towel around his neck sat and watched two other big men in big shorts and singlets pound into each other and dance around and punch fast and furiously into the air and a pad on a hand.

“Give uz twenty!!” pound pound etc pound etc wham wham etc thwack etc.  I was imagining comic book thought bubbles with ZHAM, WACK, ZOW.  “Give uz another ten.”

The music was loud a classic rock station, my god they took up a lot of air space, floor space, psychic space.  These three blokes, and beer swilling testosterone driven blokes they were, were in a space I usually found to be empty and quiet.  They were the antithesis of the type of men I would associate with.  Anyway that’s what I felt, all my prejudices against, violence in and of itself surfaced, all my antipathy towards brutal looking men played across my now tense shoulders.  All my dislike of what aggression does to consciousness rose to my now constricted throat.

I stayed and got on the cross trainer because I was stiff and no matter what needed a workout.  I figured that at the rate they were hitting each other they would flag before too long and leave.

Finally I heard, “Where d’ya wanna go?” “Royal Oak?” “Yeah sure.” Mental note to self avoid the Royal Oak Hotel in Balmain
The blokes left and I realised that I had experienced disgust, my nose had contracted at the first whiff of sweat and my lips had pursed into a cat’s bum shape.

The bigot in me was very happy to be because I knew I was writing about disgust and to have it course through my body like an uninvited guest who sullies my house was in the end just what the writer in me needed. Gratitude to the boxing blokes for exposing my inner bigot, she needs attending to and thanks to the boxing blokes for opening me to disgust, quite an interesting night.

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I’ve been reading about emotions and how we express them I thought that over the next few weeks I’d explore Ekman’s six basic biologically encoded emotions. Paul Ekman (born February 15, 1934) is a psychologist who has been a pioneer in the study of emotions and their relation to facial expressions.  Ekman showed that contrary to the belief of some anthropologists, including Margaret Mead, the facial expressions of emotion are not culturally determined, but universal across human cultures and thus biological in origin.

Expressions he found to be universal include those indicating anger, disgust, fear, joy, sadness, and surprise. Findings on contempt are less clear, though there is at least some preliminary evidence that this emotion and its expression are universally recognized.

Sadness is an emotion  characterized by feelings of disadvantage, loss, helplessness, sorrow, and rage. When sad, people often become outspoken, less energetic and emotional. Crying an indication of sadness.

Sadness can be viewed as a temporary lowering of mood, whereas depression is characterized by a persistent and intense lowered mood, as well as disruption to one’s ability to function in day to day matters.

‘The single mood people generally put most effort into shaking is sadness…Unfortunately, some of the strategies most often resorted to can backfire, leaving people feeling worse than before. Such strategies are simply staying alone, ruminating and drowning one’s sorrows, and may be counterproductive.

Two more positive alternatives have been recommended by cognitive therapy. ‘One is to learn to challenge the thoughts at the centre of rumination and think of more positive alternatives. The other is to purposely schedule pleasant, distracting events’.

Object relations theory  by contrast stresses the utility of staying with sadness: ‘it’s got to be conveyed to the person that it’s all right for him to have the sad feelings’ – easiest done perhaps where emotional support is offered to help them begin to feel the sadness’.  Such an approach is fuelled by the underlying belief that ‘the capacity to bear loss wholeheartedly, without pushing the experience away, emerges…as essential to being truly alive and engaged with the world’.

John Cleese said, ‘the idea that sadness was actually useful was probably the most important, and for me the most surprising single thing that I learnt’ in therapy. It seems clear that, ‘a main function for sadness is to help adjust to a significant loss, such as the death of someone close or a major disappointment. Sadness brings a drop in energy and enthusiasm….This introspective withdrawal creates the opportunity to mourn a loss or frustrated hope, grasp its consequences for one’s life, and, as energy returns, plan new beginnings’.

Thus ‘sadness can be a potent force for reflection, a call for down time, a retreat, a sign of transition, a force for change’, and represents ‘a healthy and appropriate response to experiences of loss and disappointment, whether personal or global’.

When viewed  this way sadness doesn’t seem so difficult.  Yet the difficulty begins with allowing sadness in the presence of others.  I think in this society we regard emotions , especially negative emotions as infectious and because you don’t like feeling sad in yourself, you think that others will reject you if you appear sad to them and to tell the truth that’s true. So no wonder when you are feeling sad you can isolate from people, especially if you are sensitive.  This can lead to a spiral downwards. Similarly friends of a sad person who may deal with their emotions by suppression can often be callous.

On one occasion someone I knew quite well asked how I was and rather than deflecting their question and either changing the subject or just outright lying and saying, ‘Fine thanks,’ I said, really as an experiment in telling the truth, ‘I’m sad, and in a lot of pain.’  Their reply, ’Ah well, I’ll give you a bell when you’re feeling better.’ I must admit I never did get back in contact with them and my relationship with them had been close.

Lately I have been sad. Romantic loss, the death of a dear friend, failed friendships and cultural isolation all contribute to a sense of helplessness and despondency.  This is not unfamiliar territory to me.  I personally have no compensating mechanisms such as addictions, alcohol or drugs to help me suppress or cope.  I’m also aware that emotions are contagious in my experience, so it is only with trusted confidents or trained therapists that I will communicate my sadness.  Personally I am mostly okay with sadness and have no difficulty self medicating with yoga, exercise, and herbs like St John’s Wort, and homoeopathics that help my energy to stabilise. I find it necessary to have an adventure planned, a theatre event, a musical experience, a night out with friends, an excursion perhaps.

I am very empathic which means I feel and experience very clearly what others are feeling.  I read feelings easily on faces and can find the emotions embedded in your biology easily in my own face, body and chemistry.  Sadness dilates my pupils and my field of vision decreases, the area behind my lower eye orbit and throat seems to fill with fluid or get tight and I experience a feeling as if I’m going to almost cry, no doubt sometimes I do. The problem with empathy is that it’s easy to get caught up in others states of being.

As a therapist it’s great to be able to feel into another person’s beingness and help them come to terms with and gradually balance their emotions.  So I’m comfortable with your emotions but if I’m personally sad and so is my client then it takes all my  resources to tease out and separate their feelings from mine .  This mix and mingling is why we don’t like being with sad people.  Even if you are not empathic, to any extreme, you will feel others emotions. We are all interconnected and interpenetrating, energies spill out of us and others, expressing themselves and touching, affecting those around them.

In my family of origin it was necessary to read emotions subtly expressed to avoid explosions of anger that were blamed on the children.  I got pretty good at diffusing emotional explosions.  Now I am comfortable with sadness in others I have no need to change it, like Mr Cleese, I discovered, sadness often evokes amazing poignant creative expression.

Sadness is not bad in and of itself, it cannot not be sometimes. If you’ve had a difficult life experience, it is inevitable that at some point you will be sad, it is inevitable that at some point you will be happy.  It is important not to get too caught up in thinking that something is wrong with yourself, if you are sad.  So if you get sad what will you do. What have you done in the past?

I have been listening to Sigur Ros, an Icelandic post-rock band who’s music is evocative of lonely landscapes and melancholy epic beauty.  Their music is so beautiful it transcends sadness and takes your emotions into the realm of a triumphant human consciousness.  Some people find that sad music matching their mood can enable them to feel and then move on from their sadness.  For others sad music can lead to morose ruminating.  The right music always lifts me out of sadness.

Asking for help is important but make sure the help you get to stop you ruminating, dwelling on your problems is useful and emotionally supportive to you. I have recently spoken with a friend who has had a very sad loss and I asked  her what she most wanted from her friends, ’A hug.’ She said, ’That’s what I miss, human contact.  I don’t really need people to feel sympathy but I crave a hug. ‘  So we had a good bear hug as we parted and you know I feel loved and supported.

Sweet Balance…

This windy day has sent me into a spin.  I had to go out this morning and as I was walking along the street felt buffeted and distracted.  Children are ratty in this weather and some people  are irritable or just plain mad when the wind gets up some speed.  The wind hitting my bare skin is innocuous, in and of itself, but it seems to shake my brain about and I can’t think.

When I finally got back to the sanctuary of my house I started to research the effects of anti-depressants to look at the full effect from an alternative health perspective have a look at this article: http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2011/05/03/tips-to-avoiding-depression.aspx
It debunks the idea that depression is merely a chemical imbalance in your brain and suggests that many people suffering from depression also suffer from self imposed chemical and life style toxicity.
Here is a small sample:

“You are a Fat Head, so Fats are Major Players in Your Brain Health
Even if you have a decent diet, nutritional deficiencies are pervasive and can easily contribute to depression. One of the most common deficiencies is high quality omega-3 fats. Many people don’t realize that their brain is 60 percent fat, but not just any fat. It is DHA, which is an animal based omega-3 fat.
Dr. Stoll is a Harvard psychiatrist and was one of the early leaders in compiling the evidence supporting the use of animal based omega-3 fats for the treatment of depression. He wrote an excellent book that details his experience in this area called The Omega-3 Connection <http://www.amazon.com/Omega-3-Connection-Groundbreaking-Antidepression-Program/dp/B001O9CFAE/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1302988610&sr=8-1> .

Another important deficiency is exercise.
There is simply a mountain of well-done scientific research pointing to the fact that exercise is one of the most potent treatments we have for depression <http://fitness.mercola.com/sites/fitness/archive/2010/07/10/is-exercise-the-best-drug-for-depression.aspx> . Unlike drugs, it is FAR more consistently effective than placebo when done properly.

Sleep is another critical issue.
You can have the best diet and exercise program possible but if you aren’t sleeping well you can easily become depressed. Sleep and depression are so intimately linked that a sleep disorder is actually part of the definition of the symptom complex that gives the label depression.

I believe the root cause of mild to moderate depression is unrepaired emotional trauma resulting in a type of neuro-emotional short-circuiting. Your body and life are out of balance. This is so important to remember, because as soon as you start to view depression as an “illness,” you think you need to take a drug to fix it. In reality, you first need to do whatever you can to return balance to your life, and one of the key ways to doing this is addressing negative emotions. “

Given the mad–wind–effect I’ve been pondering on the decisions and resulting actions that arise out of various emotional madnesses.
Here’s the list I compiled of emotions I have felt strongly and acted strangely upon, resulting in less that optimum or unhealthy outcomes.
Infatuation mistaking it for love
Jealousy mistaking it for ownership
Envy mistaking it for entitlement
Anger mistaking it for infallibility
Fear mistaking it for helplessness
Guilt mistaking it for wickedness
Indifference mistaking it for moral rightness

Don’t get me wrong, I have at times, like all of us, been healthy and made healthy decisions.  I come from a family with stiff upper lips, so learning a range of emotional expression came late to me. At first as I learnt to feel and express feelings I learnt that any emotion was dangerous so I learnt control.  As a teenager I became involved in the theatre and my first realisation was that I was physically stiffer than anyone else. I leant that my neck was stiff and that I had the emotional range of a teaspoon.

Psychodrama was big in the theatre group that I studied with.  Simple emotions with easy to express gestures I learnt In a basic fashion. Almost clown-like joy, exaggerated postural collapse to express sadness.  I learnt to express, but it took years and a plethora of experiences to gain any subtleness. I learnt to recognise the physical signs and symptoms of feeling.  The hollowness in the pit of my stomach signalling sadness, the tingle of adrenalin that comes with anxiety, my warm hands when I am happy.

I learnt to be careful of extremes of emotions, I learnt that what I feel is often the result of projections.  That is, seeing in others what I deny or dislike about myself.  For example If I thought someone was betraying me it was because I was in some way betraying myself.

A friend decided that I was attempting to flirt with a guy she fancied, and accused me of grass–cutting. I had spoken to said man but only in relation to a professional referral to a psychologist who dealt with singers.  I asked myself had I betrayed her. No I’d actually betrayed myself by allowing someone else to dictate my actions and direct my emotions. Often the very thing a person accuses you of is the very thing they themselves do in some form or other and deny.

Knowing about projection in yourself and its reciprocal expression in others is so useful.  It means that you don’t take others behaviour as a personal affront.  The control I learnt in my family gives me the space to consider events and not react but to respond.

Relationships with people are complex but the most important relationship of all, you with yourself is mirrored in all your relationships and as your emotional range, physical health, chemical balance and self awareness increase so does your potential as a human being and your potential for happiness.

The rain has stopped for now, the haus frau in me has finally been able to wash her sheets.  This morning after teaching the early morning (6:30am yes am) yoga exercise ball class, I sauntered home stretched out and hungry.  After washing the sheets I started to hang them on the line and there hanging in the sky was the big pale orange moon, hanging close to the earth, it set around 10:45am today.

The March moon is called a chaste moon, it’s a spring moon in the northern hemisphere. Here the blissful season of Autumn waxes towards us.  Yet here we are in an atmosphere of fear, some people partially blame the moon’s pull for the recent natural disasters.

Our earth’s plates are on the move, the sun is directing big flares out from its core and many of them have and will come our way distorting the electromagnetic fields around our planet, god knows what effect they have on us and our home world. As I write the sun has 34 sunspots, some of which could create what’s called M-class flares. A big sunspot is  emerging over the sun’s south eastern limb, and it is crackling  with activity. NASA’s Solar Dynamics Observatory recorded a surge of extreme ultraviolet radiation from the sunspot’s magnetic canopy on March 21st:  <http://www.spaceweather.com/> .  This sort of activity can disrupt electrical equipment and again some people feel its effects as heat, tingling or crawling sensations on their body’s.

In reality we have a Corn Moon, a harvest moon, this is a time to “harvest the gifts you have nurtured and give to those who are in need. Collect and store fresh herbs for the coming winter. Bake special breads to honour the God and Goddess of grain and growing things, share them with your family and friends but save some to offer the Earth.” Lifted from the Pagan Resource Guide, and you all know I’m a very resourceful pagan but definitely need guidance.

Our world is beset by natural disasters.  We build cities on fault lines, to make use of the resources such as oil, water and heat generated by that configuration.  The third world often suffers mudslides, floods, famines and we get used to the starving faces and masks of horror, we become numb to catastrophe.

I see it this way, there are 3 basic ways to relate to the world and others.  We can relate in a secure way, an anxious way or in be in denial or avoidance mode.  I personally have had all 3 types of relationships with others and with the world.  I’d prefer to relate to the world, secure in my self.  If I’m anxious I make bad often impulsive decisions.  If I’m in denial I take no action or make decisions.

I’ve had  quite a few e-mails that go quickly into the deleted file, e-mails attempting to cash in on the Japanese disaster soliciting or touting for insurance, overcoming fear workshops…aghhhhh.  Yet here we are in a fractured world, your decision to help with a donation, volunteer work or such like, could if possible, come from a sense of connection to others.  My adage is to look after each other, in our community and in our families.  In this age of bottom line, step outside your comfort zone and at least pause and offer a thought to the suffering, not because we are afraid and there but for the grace of…. we go, but because you feel connected to all the beings and processes of this planet.

I was listening to an environmentalist  speaking the other evening.  He called the animals and plants of this planet the workers and likened us to guests partaking of their effort and energy.  They give us food, circulate energy, clean up after us and we as the guests use it all up.  Well I’m not sure that the guests are behaving very well, not only with regard to the planet and the over use and injudicious use of its resources but with regard to each other.

It takes  a moment to smile at a stranger, offer assistance to person in need, to make a donation, to volunteer.  But this new found kindness coming from inner security is dependant on first and foremost your kindness to yourself. Make sure you balance yourself with good alkaline foods and clean water, so that the chemical soup of your body is at least a good matrix out of which to observe and interact with the world. If you have a fiery or nervous temperament meditate or at least take the time to relax, any way that works for you, so you can be calmer in relating to others and from my point of view the most important thing is to question your beliefs, inquire as to where you acquired any belief and see if it’s actually valid or true, or if its an imbedded prejudice coming from your family’s background or social mores.

This will enable you to see more clearly your own needs and those of others and possibly enable you decide to act from a sense of inner security and love for our beleaguered planet and its inhabitants.  Our love goes out to all.

In the last few years I’ve had uncharacteristic and occasional sleep difficulties. It’s origin: stress, hormonal changes and bad sleep hygiene. The day after a bad night’s sleep I am irritable, forget tasks and am generally inefficient.

I’m a fairly good observer of my own behaviour and those weary days made me very aware of the wonderful world of sleep and how essential it is for my wellbeing. After a good nights sleep I wake in morning and spend relaxing time taking in the light and season of the new day, I stretch and get up slowly allowing my body to orientate, I feel great. After a poor night’s sleep I wake groaning, stiff, irritable unable to take in the light ambiences from my bedroom window. The only thing I want to do is pull the bed covers around me and curl back to sleep. I carry that feeling of weariness all day.

I started to consider the how’s of getting enough sleep and enough quality sleep. Apparently the most physically healing, restorative part of sleep is the deep sleep that you have more of at the beginning of your sleep period. Towards the end of the sleep period you have more REM (rapid eye movement sleep) and that indicates a dreaming state. Dreams have been described physiologically as a response to neural processes during sleep and psychologically as reflections of the subconscious. The significance of dreams depends on the person having them and the cultural context. Suffice to say good REM sleep enhances your good mood during the day.

Sleep stages and brain activity
Stage 1 (Drowsiness) – Stage 1 lasts just five or ten minutes. Eyes move slowly under the eyelids, muscle activity slows down, and you are easily awakened.
Stage 2 (Light Sleep) – Eye movements stop, heart rate slows, and body temperature decreases.

Stages 3 & 4 (Deep Sleep) – You’re difficult to awaken, and if you are awakened, you do not adjust immediately and often feel groggy and disoriented for several minutes. Deep sleep allows the brain to go on a little vacation needed to restore the energy we expend during our waking hours. Blood flow decreases to the brain in this stage, and redirects itself towards the muscles, restoring physical energy. Research also shows that immune functions increase during deep sleep.

Stage 5 REM sleep (Dream Sleep) – At about 70 to 90 minutes into your sleep cycle, you enter REM sleep. You usually have three to five REM episodes per night. This stage is associated with processing emotions, retaining memories and relieving stress. Breathing is rapid, irregular and shallow, the heart rate increases, blood pressure rises, males may have penile erections, and females may have clitoral enlargement.

Dreams may be the retrieval and reordering of long term memories or a physiological repair mechanism, no body really knows.
If you are interested have a look at: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dream
Research suggests that common aspects of modern lifestyle suppress dreaming or REM sleep. Many widely used medications legal and illegal – especially antidepressants and sleeping pills, as well as evening alcohol consumption and cannabis, constrain normal dreaming. And now, new findings are establishing a clear connection between the loss of dreaming and serious illness.

Sleep problems – insomnia
Insomnia means difficulty with either falling or staying asleep. Usually, people keep themselves awake by worrying about going to sleep. Insomnia can be treated at home, but chronic or long-term sleep problems may need professional treatment.
Insomnia is a symptom, not a disease. It means having trouble with how much or how well you sleep. This may be caused by difficulties in either falling or staying asleep. Self-reported sleeping problems, dissatisfaction with sleep quality and daytime tiredness are the only defining characteristics of insomnia because it is such an individual experience. Long-term chronic insomnia needs professional support from a sleep disorder clinic.

The concept of ‘a good sleep’ differs widely from person to person. While the average night’s sleep for an adult is around seven or eight hours, some people only need four, while others like up to 10 hours or more. What seems like insomnia to one person might be considered a good sleep by another.

A common complaint
Over one-third of people experience insomnia from time to time, but only around five per cent need treatment for the condition. Such things as stressful episodes, jet lag, and changes in sleeping environments, some acute illnesses and stimulant medications typically cause transient or short-term insomnia. Normal sleeping habits return once the acute event is over.

If a person has experienced sleeping difficulties for a month or more, this is called persistent or chronic insomnia. There are many causes of persistent insomnia. These include:
• Secondary insomnia – due to a range of medical and psychiatric problems and the chronic use of drugs and alcohol.
• Primary sleep disorders – include circadian rhythm disorders, central sleep apnoea-insomnia syndrome, inadequate sleep syndromes and periodic limb movement or restless legs syndromes.
• Idiopathic insomnia – sleeplessness without a known cause, formerly called childhood onset insomnia.
Keep sleep in perspective

People who suffer from insomnia are normally frustrated or annoyed by it. Paradoxically, this emotional state contributes to keeping them awake. It helps to stop expecting a set amount of sleep every night. Having less sleep than you’d like doesn’t cause any harm. Allow yourself to fall short of the ideal without getting anxious about it.

Simple remedies for short-term insomnia
Reducing anxiety and sticking to a day–night routine can improve sleep quality.

Suggestions include:
• Don’t nap during the day.
• Cut down on smoking and drinking.
• Avoid tea, coffee and other caffeinated drinks before bed.
• Take regular exercise each day but don’t exercise strenuously just before bedtime.
• Do something to relax, such as meditate or have a warm bath.
• Learn to relax with Yoga Nidra relaxation techniques
• Only go to bed if you feel sleepy.
• A magnesium supplement taken in or with a hot drink can relax your whole body.
• Numerous plants have a sedative action. Herbs commonly prescribed as aids in promoting sleep include: passion-flower , hops, valerian , skullcap and chamomile. Take as a tea.
• Hop flower sachets. The scent of hop flowers are soporific, so if you can get fresh hop flowers put them in a muslin bag and put it under you pillow.
• Lettuce soup, taken as the last meal at night, is very sleep inducing.
• Go to bed later.
• Stop reading, worrying or watching television in bed and limit your activities in the bedroom to sleeping and sex.
• If you can’t sleep, get up, go to another room and do something else until you feel sleepy again.
• Get up at the same time every morning regardless of how much sleep you have had.
• Avoid ‘judging’ your sleep on a day-to-day basis.

Treatment for long-term insomnia
Insomnia that has persisted for years needs professional support and a lot of patience. It might take some time to re-establish normal sleeping patterns.

Some of the techniques used by a sleep disorder clinic might include:
• A sleep diary, to help pinpoint the pattern of insomnia
• A program of mild sleep deprivation
• Medication to help set up a new sleeping routine
• Exposure to bright light in the morning
• Behavioural therapy.
Things to remember
• Insomnia is a symptom not a disease. The cause (or causes) of insomnia needs to be identified and corrected.
• Insomnia means having trouble with how well or how much you sleep.
• People keep themselves awake by worrying about going to sleep.
• Long-term chronic insomnia needs professional support and a lot of patience.

I sleep well most nights now. Experiencing transient insomnia left a very positive effect on me. Rather than just take a good nights sleep for granted I have come to value it as one of my best tools in feeling good. I’ve come to regard sleep as important, if not more important, than sex. For me a good nights sleep is worth altering my behaviour, it’s like a valued and loved partner in my quest to feel fabulous and is my greatest tool in looking good and not aging.